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This 100%. Like, it’s really awful that so many of the founding fathers like Washington and Jefferson owned slaves. But overall, especially judging by their times, they were decent men. There were also a lot of jerks during that time that should be judged harshly both by our standards and theirs, guys like Andrew Jackson. This is why I don’t think it’s a double standard to be more forgiving to the slave-owning Founding Fathers than to slave-owning Confederates. Slavery is plain wrong no matter what the era, but societal consciousness was not “woke” to the same degree in 1776 as it was in, say, antebellum 1800s. (Of course, this is speaking broadly; there are exceptions in both eras.)

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This documentary is also an incredible peace of the puzzle surrounding the hanging of The Dakota 38+2. Each year, a group of Lakota tribesmen/women ride from the Lower Brûlée’ reservation in South Dakota, all the way to Mankato, Minnesota to the hanging site. I got to witness them ride into town the day after Christmas. It was absolutely breathtaking to hear their battle cries and songs of anguish coupled with horses hooves striking the pavement. It was a powerful lesson in healing and reconciliation. You are correct, he did not see combat. However, he was part of the detail that buried the bodies after the Battle of Stillman Run, so he was familiar with some of the horrors of war from an early age.

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As a kid, we used to swim in a pond that was mud at the bottom with areas you knew to avoid due to the leeches and that we would occasionally have to evacuate for a while so my uncle could kill the snapping turtle that had come  Now my aunt has an above ground pool 50’ from that pond and my spoiled niece & nephew & cousins have no idea what it’s like to sink your toes down into that muck. And adult me would avoid that like the plague. I always wanted to grow up faster so I could steal some of my mom’s really pretty heels. I thought they looked like the prettiest, classiest things and couldn’t wait to wear some. Oh, my God, the first time I wore a pair, I about wrecked my knee and twisted my ankle. Nevermind the absolute agony my heels were in by the end of the day. Fuck that noise.

 

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Studies are finding more and more data to support the idea that the bacteria makeup in your gut is way more important than previously thought. The gut is often referred to as the “second brain”. Eating a lot of junk food and garbage can certainly contribute to mental illness. My dad brought home lobsters one time. As a kid, it was a magical day. We selected the lobsters, brought them home, and got to play with the forbidden creatures from the grocery store for a while on the kitchen floor. Then, we were sent out back, because it was the 90’s and that’s what happened as a kid, and when we came back, dinner was ready.

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We had a 20-minute discussion about why I wanted this. Saying I hadn’t wanted children since I was thirteen. She let me do most of the talking. I explained I knew it wasn’t reversible. She reiterated that back to me. Then simply said, “ I think that’s everything I need. We will get some labs but I will see you on surgery day.” I cried in her exam room. While I don’t doubt that there are a lot of people who regret it afterward, they’re still adults who should have to deal with the consequences of their own informed decisions. It’s no injustice for people to have the freedom to make mistakes. It’s a much bigger decision IMO to decide to have an actual child, and there are barely any restrictions on that.

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The regret rate for women who get their tubes tied is only about 20%. It is not nearly high enough to be denying ALL women. And yes, 20% seems like a lot, but the average regret rate for other optional surgeries is at about 8%. It also seems like most of the women who have regret were not aware it was permanent. Better counseling could cut that number way down. But instead, they just think all women are too stupid to know what they want. The regret rate for women under 30 who have never had children is actually even lower, only 6%. It’s fucking ridiculous that women have to wade through so much paternalistic bullshit to make reproductive choices for themselves.

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Just as an FYI, a hysterectomy does not affect hormones. Hysterectomy does not involve removal of the ovaries – that’s a different procedure called an oophorectomy and is not always performed along with a hysterectomy. If you keep your ovaries, there are no hormonal issues.  Lots of stories like this one in /Endo by fellow endometriosis warriors. No matter if it’s a reproductive choice or severe and chronic health condition, the system is designed to discredit and ignore women’s needs and experiences. I absolutely need once a month to live that would cost 10k out of pocket each time I get it.

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I know the feeling; I’m not on it anymore, but last year I had to jump through hoop after hoop trying to get a $7,000 dollar a month medication covered… it’s bullshit that our system is this fucked. Like if people don’t have insurance they’re basically just doomed. It’s such a nightmare, I’ve spent hours on the phone with I insurance and hospital billing departments and everything in between. It’s so hard to advocate for yourself when you’re sick too, I’m doing a lot better now but the worst time in my life was fighting.

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When I was last sick, I got a dual pack of cough medicine, one for the day, one for the night. The day one was orange and felt really bad going down due to (I assume) the acidity of the flavoring. Whereas the Grape one went down really smooth and I liked the flavor. The problem was, the grape was the PM stuff. I decided to take that during the day because I didn’t want to taste the day one. I kept falling asleep, and I think in the haze of having that stuff in my system didn’t put it together that it was because of the medicine. So I kept taking it. I ended up having to take an extra day off of work because I felt drunk the morning after.

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That sounds about right to me. I had a similar experience after watching Fight Club when I was a young teenager. So thankful that the movie showed how damaging toxic masculinity can be to ourselves and the people around us. Still want to read the book! I’ve never seen a cogent layout of the ideology that made much sense. How do you have a property in an anarchistic system without it being entirely pinned to violence or the threat of violence. There’s no coherent mechanism or anything, it’s just a bunch of would-be petty lords (none of them would be serfs, no sir!) and what passes for their theory is absolute woo

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It’s entirely dependent on the hospital, clinic, or individual doctor to decide what requirements are in place. It should be illegal to require a husband’s consent. Shop around for a new doctor when possible. I agree here. After having my son I spoke to my OBVYN about getting sterilized. She didn’t look to my husband, she spoke to ME about MY choices. Though to be fair, when she’d asked how long we waited before having sex after having my baby, she gave him a look when I said 4 weeks. I had to correct her that it was ME wanting it.

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However, they should, like abortions, be considered an essential part of women’s health care as both can be elective or medically necessary, and both impact the quality of life of the woman. If men get angry their wife wants or needs a hysterectomy (or abortion) for medical reasons as I’m assuming they wouldn’t marry without having previously discussed procreation plans, he needs to either decide it’s a deal-breaker and leave the marriage or man the fuck up and deals with infertility the way millions of women have done and will continue to do for centuries. There’s always a risk in a marriage that you won’t be able to conceive.

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Watch out there. It’s a slippery slope to cake for dinner with a jug of soda. Then you’ve gained 70 pounds in two years’ time and 8 years later you still haven’t lost all the weight. And have lost a couple of teeth to the bad habits that you had for those couple years of wanton soda and cake because dental care is too expensive and the rot continues even for years after you stop. Ask me how I know. I used to play schoolteacher as a kid who thought it would be the most fun in the world. I’ve been doing it for several years for real now, and while I do enjoy it, it’s not the same kind of fun. To remind me, I keep hanging on my classroom wall a photograph of the 6-year-old me explaining something on a child’s blackboard.

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Isn’t it weird how we are so excited to organize things when we have nothing that needs organizing, but when we do have stuff that needs organization we see it as a chore? Kinda funny. I guess you need to go back into that mindset, the one where you surrounded by colorful binders and neatly kept papers. Thought I was the only one. Seriously think an adult neighbor pulled me out of swimming in a drainage ditch one time. It’s one of those early morning invasive thoughts I’d prefer to forget. Also, where the fuck were my parents. As a kid, we used to swim in a pond that was mud at the bottom with areas you knew to avoid due to the leeches and that we would occasionally have to evacuate for a while so my uncle could kill the snapping turtle that had come a’calling. Now my aunt has an above ground pool 50’ from that pond and my spoiled niece & nephew & cousins have no idea what it’s like to sink your toes down into that muck. And adult me would avoid that like the plague.