More selfishly, since becoming pregnant, my friend has.. more or less stopped talking to me. We don’t talk like we used to. I get that she’s tired, and has a lot going on and a lot to do, and I am excited for her. But. I don’t want to risk doing the same things to my friends. (Plus, I do not like messes, don’t like loud noise, I like having alone time and doing my own thing, etc. I don’t think I’m a good candidate for being a mom. The infuriating fact is men don’t have to choose between those basic human needs/desires and kids. Fathers aren’t forced to choose like mothers are and it’s bullshit!
Do you think that if you sat down and talked to her about how that made you feel, she would stop? You don’t need to “come to a decision” first or tell her what you are thinking to tell her that her bringing it up makes you feel bad. Sister’s been across the spectrum since highschool so about once a year they just ask what the verdict is right now. Just to be aware. They’ve both seen what can happen when someone who didn’t really want kids ends up with them.