I never really processed the grief, and never discussed any of it with my wife. This made her feel distant and it plunged me into depression. Having never experienced depression before, it took a long time for me to recognize it. I’ve been seeing a therapist for almost a year now, and it’s helping. I’ve found I’m at my best and my marriage is strongest when I process things verbally. My kids also benefit because they see a grown man talking about how he feels. It’s equally important for my daughter as it is my son.
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Slightly unrelated but I used to tutor kids high school and below in math. When you talk with them you realize how much your day to day as a kid in school legitimately feels like a prison. You’re told where to sit, what to do, where to look, where not to look when to eat when you can drink, and ask to pee. If you’re caught losing your attention at all during that 8-hour block then someone yells at you.
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