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I’m also 17 and I was in your exact same position 8 months ago. I just got out of my first relationship. I thought for a long time that I was sad because I needed a girlfriend and that would fix my problems but I was wrong. My best piece of advice is to not pay attention to what those around you are saying and doing and just run your own race. Things like relationships will come eventually and just be willing to take risks and seize opportunities when they come. It’s hard to be by yourself but remember that being single doesn’t define who you are and you are in control of bringing value to your life.

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As a male, I felt extreme pressure to live up to what I thought were the masculine ideals of promiscuity and general dickishness. The pressure was so great, and I so wanted a relationship, that resulted in crippling anxiety. Only of course it wasn’t until I was in my mid-20s that I could acknowledge it as anxiety, in my teenage brain it was merely (forgive my language) “being a pussy.” and I thought I had failed as a man. This is something I struggled with a lot too. I didn’t kiss a girl until I was 19, and that was only because I was drunk. It started an unhealthy relationship with alcohol that I have since ended but led me to a lot of dark and confusing places.

 

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